2021.06.19 08:18 NetMassimo Presidenziali in Iran, vittoria al primo turno dell'ultraconservatore Ebrahim Raisi
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2021.06.19 08:18 angstyart my nerves are shot
This is going to be a long and emotional ramble about how I got to where I am today. It has a ton of triggers in it, I'd assume. I can't think the clearest on what that might be, so if you're not in a good state tonight please watch the new Loki series on Disney+ because it's amazing and I'm kind of getting too old to be on Tumblr. I need adults to talk to about it.
This is complicated. To squash 18 hellish months into a couple sentences, I have been living with some friends of mine since COVID cost me the job I had just landed, the apartment I had just moved into, and the last remaining shred of tenacity in my body. I didn't break. I shattered. And the hits kept coming. One of my sisters had an emergency surgery last year, in the middle of EVERYTHING. My new job was abusive. After 96 days and a half-body rash, I quit with nothing else to go on. Somehow, by that Christmas I had a new one. They're great people.
As things have opened up, my friends (who are older, very much mentors to me) have begun traveling more to see family they haven't been able to be with in months. Every time they leave, despite my best efforts, I disintegrate into a sort of sedated hermit that hobbles around in a wake of poptart crumbs and empty ginger ale bottles, muttering to myself in between long naps. I keep telling myself "I don't want to be this way." I had imagined that somehow telling myself that worked in the past? I had learned how to push through things, but that doesn't work anymore. An overwhelming amount of my own body is chaos, perhaps or perhaps not within my control. I don't like being late. After ten minutes it's embarrassing. This whole week, my average clock in time has been 30+ mins late.
I at least know now, after being diagnosed last month, when a flare up is sort of beginning. I caught it starting up when my friends announced they would be out for some time. Like clockwork, my body starts crumbling to dust again. I caught myself saying "it's almost like someone has taken a gun to my soul and blown it out. my nerves are shot to pieces." It's because they are.
I've come back quite a bit from where it was before, but it's like the feeling that could be expressed somewhat in those films where a crisis camp is set up. Like, tents instead of houses, and some sort of human or natural disaster strikes and just ruins what little is left. When the protagonist just wakes up and stumbles out of their tent. It's that feeling. I'm now "awake." I'm looking at everything. My nerves were shot before. I had PTSD before this. Now I have everything, every curse and blight and boil COVID brought into my life, on top of this. And even if my mood manages to be somewhat okay, my body is going to randomly become too hot to function or find any major source of light painful. My favorite foods will taste like horsecrap or something. I don't know, I'm still trying to get all this stuff straight.
Sometimes I just snap out of a daze and think - where the f--u-c--k am I? Other times it feels part of me is just screaming and screaming and screaming. I have a lot of comorbid mental health issues. Really, fibro is the new guy, the others are regulars. There's a lot of kindness and immeasurable compassion that I received in this era, which is nice, because I'm pretty certain I wouldn't have survived it otherwise. 2020 crushed me the way it sounds when a car tire rolls over glass. I can't even walk straight, write straight, walk down a set of stairs right. Nothing. Whatever.
TL;DR - My body can't handle simple concepts like being alone for a brief time, so here's me at 2 am keeping my body out of my blanket entirely so my feet stop burning. Rant about how 2020 beat me harder than Lucille (TWD) ever could.
submitted by angstyart to Fibromyalgia [link] [comments]
2021.06.19 08:18 JAUNTYa How to make myself believe I'm getting consistent with my sniper shots and build confidence rather than feeling like most of what I hit is based off luck?
I've played sniper for around 200 hours now and there are times where my accuracy spikes, we're talking at least 7 headshots in under 30 seconds, decent accuracy. But to me it just feels like it always feels like a lucky burst of relief. It never happens unless I die an incredible amount, almost as if it's a Rocky reaction (he takes hell amounts of punishment and eventually explodes and overwhelms his opponent).
How do I get rid of this mindset? What should I do to make myself feel like I'm actually getting better?
submitted by JAUNTYa to truetf2 [link] [comments]
2021.06.19 08:18 shravslibra20 Novak Djokovic - Goran Ivanisevic vs Tommy Hass - Feliciano Lopez Doubles Funny Moments | Mallorca
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2021.06.19 08:18 TrueVegetable [Build, Tuned] Rising Edge MA Chassis
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2021.06.19 08:18 SxQuadro Cardano Creator: Ethereum (ETH) Will Beat Bitcoin (BTC) In the Long Run
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2021.06.19 08:18 WoodJablomi My Buddy just got this stat line.... Insane!
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2021.06.19 08:18 marinmarge Fool me once shame on you fool me twice shame on me
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2021.06.19 08:18 GregorianChant007 The Catholic Church Has Cancer
Now please take a bit of time to hear me out, because I love the Church.
There has been a trend lately that if someone in the Church has done something very wrong and evil, the Catholic Church is then seen as evil. (Think Cardinal Mccarrick, Pennsylvania abuse scandal, or Canadian residential schools, for instance). What we forget though, is that the Church is a body, not just an institution. So I propose an analogy that I think sheds light on the matter. The Church is a body, and that body has cancer.
Cancer is when some cells within a body turn to their own set of rules, and as a result harm the good of the body itself. This does not mean the body itself is bad, just as you wouldn't say someone with cancer is bad. But the body of the Church is ill. It needs the cancer to be rooted out, and the body to be strengthened in order for the good to operate freely.
This is perhaps a radical shift from what you will see in the opinions of most popular media in our age. They will generally portray the Church itself as the problem, rather than some cells of that Church that need to be rooted out. I believe that these opinions are only harming what is still good in the Church. We need a radical mind shift.
Please pray for the Church. She needs our prayers now as always. May we humbly submit ourselves to the will of God, and grow close to Him so we can be healed. May he truly be the Heart of His Body.
(Disclaimer) this analogy is not my own creation. It's from a homily of a priest that I know well and trust. He puts all of his Sunday homilies out on most podcast sources, as well as Facebook, under the name "A Beggar's Heart". If you want a link to the specific video where he makes this analogy, please pm me and I'd be happy to provide it.
submitted by GregorianChant007 to Catholicism [link] [comments]
2021.06.19 08:18 Ragnarokcometh Officers cleared in use-of-force video
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2021.06.19 08:18 Friendly_Dependent31 Charge-to-mass ratio// how do i know when to use which equation?
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2021.06.19 08:18 firefighter2021 M89 Release notes
M89 Release notes - Google Nest Help
13729.57.15 Google Wifi; 13729.57.19 Nest Wifi; 1.54.253765 Nest Wifi point Published June 2021
This software update includes:
2021.06.19 08:18 PPAccPP Wet
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2021.06.19 08:18 Divot-Digger Safely backing up saves from multiple accounts
My PS5 is randomly going into sleep mode. I've gone through the Sony troubleshooter, and I'm now being told to completely erase and re-install the system software. Not ideal, but I'd prefer that than have to send it away for repair.
I have PS+, and the Sony article explains I can backup my saves to the cloud. Great!
But I have two sub accounts (my kids) and I would not be welcome back at home if I lost their game progress. It's critical I don't make a mistake on this :)
The Sony article isn't specific on what happens to sub accounts for PS Plus Cloud. My kids have access to all of the PS Plus games, so it's all connected on the console, but does my backup contain their data?
submitted by Divot-Digger to PS5 [link] [comments]
2021.06.19 08:18 leftok 19 June 2021 Betting Tips
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2021.06.19 08:18 Smooth-Literature292 Never take acid and ride man!
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2021.06.19 08:18 FlowStateShaman Helicopter - On Ya Way (Original Mix) [1993 U.K.]
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2021.06.19 08:18 CuriousQuest73 What age did you start your period?
I started mine when I was 9 years old (I was probably in 4th or 5th grade), which I think was early. I dont have any of the associated health problems, some articles mention more risk of promiscuity or self harm with a myriad of different social problems.
I always just thought it was normal. For other girls out there, what age did you start your period and has your period flow changed over time?
submitted by CuriousQuest73 to Periods [link] [comments]
2021.06.19 08:18 Lopze420blazeit Does anyone know where this Scar portrait comes from? I saw this in DJ Peach Cobbler's video on stalkers factions. I'm not a fan of how his portrait looks normally. (english isn't my first language)
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2021.06.19 08:18 _nitrous_oxiide_ Saw thousands of bikes in downtown today!
2021.06.19 08:18 redhatGizmo Saraswati flowed in Haryana till early 15th century: Study
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2021.06.19 08:18 Joj185 All fresh Elite Summer Solstice Elite. Equal participants free to join :-)
|submitted by Joj185 to EggsIncCoOp [link] [comments]|
2021.06.19 08:18 shanabailey ELEPHONE W6 Smart Watch for 16.00 USD with coupon (Best price in history: $18.99)
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2021.06.19 08:18 iLLicit_xD Cooler Master MF120 Halo not detected by Master plus or "ARGB Small Controller Software"
| I just bought cooler master mf120 halo fans for my lian li o11 cabinet, I cannot control the rgb without opening up my cabinet just to press a button, MasterPlus shows that it is compatible with mf120 halo but when i launch it shows an error stating "No compatible devices detected" i have tried both ways of connecting the fans directly to the rgb headers on motherboard (rgb controls on msi motherboards are absolute trash) and on the small dongle but still the software wont detect the fans.|
I did some digging and found out some posts (more than a year old) stating old MasterPlus did not support mf120's but now they have it on their compatible devices, it is really frustrating as the rgb spectrum mode on msi mystic light is garbage and i really dont wanna open my cabinet every time i feel like changing colors.
submitted by iLLicit_xD to coolermaster [link] [comments]
2021.06.19 08:18 sushihentailover Arizona greentea whit cucumber flavor taste amazing